Rainy Positive Attitude

In the summer of 2016 my dog Toph and I started a bike ride in Vancouver Canada with the idea of heading home to Pomona California. I went through a heavy break up the year before so while planning for this trip I had the intention of trying to rediscover myself, and wanting to take myself out of what I was comfortable or used to in the hopes that I could heal.

I pulled Toph in a trailer attached to my bike and packed way too much stuff which made climbing mountain passes pretty hilarious (not hilarious at the time). Along the way we were welcomed by some of the kindest people you could ever meet, they let Toph and I set up on their front lawns, porches, and even slept in some bedrooms to get off the road and get some rest.

This bike tour with all the uphill climbs and the downhill descents resembled the actual highs and lows of traveling this way. The struggle, the slow push up a seemingly endless uphill with no idea if you're even close to the top but knowing that you are headed on the right path and as the peak reveals itself you're in awe and amazement that you pushed through to get there and you're also able to take a deep breath while you coast until the next one. This constant up and down taught me about patience, trusting in myself and my path, being okay with being uncomfortable and not giving up but really believing in myself.

After Toph and I made it to Arcata California I was ready to come home and I don't want to speak for Toph but I think she was ready too. So I rode over to the next big town, Eureka, got a hotel room for the night, watched the Matrix 2 on tv, and rented a car the next morning to head home. I'll never forget the look on Tophs face when I put her in the rental car, lots of confusion and relief. My eternal thanks to all the people that took care of us on this trip, without you, we wouldn't have made it this far. Thank you!

Shot on 8mm film June 2016
*A zine about this bike tour will be released in October 2019.

Los Angeles Zine Fest 2017

In January I was asked by Los Angeles Zine Fest if I wanted to collaborate with them on creating a zine for the festival in May. At that time I was thinking a lot about community and what that means and didn't really know how to talk about it. LAZF contacting me was the final push towards answering that, I decided I would compile a zine where I did my best to collect the voices of amazing community members I know and also add in some of my own experience with community. This new zine will be available at LAZF next Sunday, May 28th. Hope you can come visit and say hi. 

Two of the LAZF organizers asked me if I could do a little video to talk about the new zine and what the/my process is like. Below is the link to the video if you would like to watch me talk about my how this zine came to be and a little of my life process. 

https://www.facebook.com/lazinefest/videos/1355531151191960/
 

Los Angeles Zine Fest 2016

Waking up this morning to a loud thunder strike, and the pitter-patter of rain on my roof and I'm reflecting about how special yesterday was. Also what joy means to me- (you might not be ready for the longest run-on sentence of this Monday). Joy is getting to zine fest on a quiet rattling bus and keeping track of my breath, walking over and feeling this rush of excitement to see the most wonderful people, finding out you get to sit next to all your favorite artist, giving special brooches I made for Daisy, Rhea, and Kenzo (lazf organizers), feeling inspired by Carolinas nieces zine making, seeing Jasper trade his first zine for all cat zines, hugging Carolina(duh), Elises gifted ladder pin that says "getting there", looking over at kyles table and he's selling like a boss, seeing Jason and catching up and giving him a really long hug for strength, hooking up my guy Myke with a "sensitive boys gang" brooch and making him the president, picking up zines from chickchawpress, seeing Ellen's table setup and telephone zine and freaking out, waving at people I've never met, saying hi to Lora and picking up real life printed treasure, seeing the unity press boys and afterwards directing everyone I know to their table, seeing Kevin and giving him a tote bag and a hi-five, seeing traveling Kevin and feeling the kindness emanate and picking up some sweet skate zines, finding out Grace brought zines to trade and feeling so lucky, Rob Brown risograph masterpieces, sitting next to Fin and experiencing their first zine fest and watching them kick so much butt, seeing miles, witnessing the support of my little not so little cousin Ronald and Serena (thank you), seeing all the video game inspired zines Thomas picked up, giving my entire zine collection to my sister Jenny, getting more science zines from Two Photon, meeting Patrick Gibson and friends and collectively freaking out and sharing skateboard stories, meeting Sharada and getting a precious zine about "how to take up space", getting a bird Keychain from Daisy, seeing a ton of dogs especially that black and white dog on that humyns shoulders, having an art piece in the gallery upstairs, anticipating a hug from trent, getting that hug and giving him a brooch that says "gentle trent", receiving the most meaningful and beautiful print from Jess and wanting to cry, meeting so many damn people, picking up a Sergio Terans zine of his relief prints, trading for the most beautiful print of a girl taking a poop selfie, mopping up coconut juice (really enjoyed that for some reason), sharing the most delicious poptart from the most special person/artist Morgan and proceeding to share that fucking poptart cause it was out of this world, hearing Cheynes laugh, witnessing people support zines and makers, seeing Erik and just vibing on the long lost vibes and joy of seeing each other, xavier tabling for me so I could squeeze through the madness to pick up treasure, talking to Chase about balance and dogs, hugging Rhea at the door and thanking her for the most magical zine fest, and riding the bus home with my best friend feeling so much unbelievable support, care, and love from the entire day from people I knew and people I just met. Thank you LA zine fest for making this space real and nurturing an environment where this much amount of joy can exist, and thank you for everyone that supported me and my work whether it was a trade, hand wave, hug, or sale. If you read this entire thing I love you, lets go for a walk and have a potluck.
 

San Diego Zine Fest!!!

Hi friends, I'll be tabling at SD zine fest for the first time and I'm excited because I've only been to San Diego once and it was truly a wonderful time. I got to ride a carousel for the first time in my life (I was 26 years old!!!), went on a mini hike in a botanical garden, ate vegan donuts, met some really wonderful humyn beings and the best pair of dogs, Luna and Lenore, walked those dogs, talked about homemade local tortillas, the future, love, and went to one of the last shows(kinda) at the che cafe at sdsu. I know this zine fest will be another special experience. I'll have a new zine about heartbreak & loss, possibly some other zines (working on it), my first risograph print!!, and the usual brooches, stickers, and other goods. Hope to see you there!!!

San Diego Zine Fest 2015
October 3rd, Saturday 12pm- 6pm
FREE & ALL AGES
1955 Julian Ave. San Diego, CA92113


p.s. heres a shot of the beginning stages of my new print, about 5 percent done.
 

San Francisco Zine Fest 2015

I'm still recovering from the weekend adventure that was sf zine fest. When I first found out that I was going back to the bay to show my work, I was filled with excitement and joy, knowing that I'd be back in this place that I spent four years in, learning, growing, loving. 

My really good friend Elise (that also got a table) asked me what my travel plans were for the fest and after talking to two of my friends, Randy & Trent and setting that up, we all decided to carpool up together and Randy & Trent would show their work on my half table! It worked out perfectly. Elise's friend Emily hooked us up with a place to stay through one of her friends, THANK YOU TOMMASO for letting us stay in your humble abode! We all had such great sleep that night! 

So the morning of SF zine fest comes, we go pick up snacks in preparation for a long day, and we get there at the perfect time. I was inspired waiting in the line with all those people because I saw all the contraptions people had to help them carry all their stuff! Lots of DIY dollies. And the work, there was so much good work!!! We all had the chance to set up early, I feel so happy with how we all figured out that little 3 foot space. 

This is Trent & Randy getting ready right before the event started!

Seeing familiar faces, friends, and meeting complete strangers but connecting through art-making was so special to me. The bay is where my art-making/understanding was nurtured and developed so to be back in this setting was too cool. I saw a friend that I went to school with that I haven't seen since I left the bay, Ray, he just came up to the side of me and said, "tony". We reminisced about school and he had so many nice things to say about my current work and work back then, him and all the people that were in the same program as me were all inspiring and motivating people. If it weren't for that group and our advisors/teachers, I wouldn't be where I am with my work today. 
 

Some of my handmade wooden brooches. I made quite a few for my friends that I knew I might see that day. It was a joy surprising J & ken with a few pins, one that said "lenore" & another that said "luna" and another that said "the pups" those are their dogs names. 

The stickers were a hit :) I used a green tea pocky box to hold em' 

I'm in awe that so many people stopped by my table and were interested in my work. I worked really hard on everything, especially my books, I made so many and to have so many people compliment my work and craftsmanship was affirming for me. I think sometimes people might not realize how powerful their words can be in these types of situations. As a vendor, you are pretty vulnerable, and I think most people are considerate of that. I have lots of respect and admiration for all the vendors there, and I feel lucky that I had the chance to sneak away from my table to get some work from other artist!! 

This is Jamie with Andy Goldsworthys piece in the Persidio, called "Spire". Elise told us all about some Andy Goldsworthy pieces that were scattered around the persidio way before we even arrived in the bay so that was something we definitely wanted to check out after the fest ended. We met up with my good friend Jamie and we all explored together admiring and experiencing these wonderful pieces. 

Here is Elise and Randy walking on another of his pieces called "wood line". It was such a beautiful experience being in between these great big trees, balancing on these logs that went up and up and up for a while. His work has these meditative elements to it, I felt so calm, relaxed and happy being in these spaces and interacting with these works. I feel lucky to have this experience for my first time at sf zine fest and to do it with this magical group of humyns. They all let me take them to my favorite burrito joint in the mission district of sf and I think it was a hit overall :)

Heres to friendship, art-making, community, slowing down, speeding up, and enjoying this beautiful experience that we call life together. Thank you to everyone that made this weekend so special. 

It's This Space In Between

It's this space in between when I forget how to breathe
an image repeat and I can't help but believe 
believe it's gone, trampled on, with no reprieve 
Please

It's the space in between that trembles and bleeds
crying myself to sleep wishing for quiet and capped pleads
holding onto what I think is dear and this damn love
plugged

oh fuck, please
it's this feeling insecurity
when you imagine who you are and that somehow gets taken away with each day
that in someplace you are being forgotten, stamped over, translation dropped
stop

the hardest part is this space in between the loved shared through first times
I can't, I'm shy, okay I'll try, now I know why, and I loved you in my own way, hi
make up your mind, I'm here, don't say goodbye, why, and the whys,

and the why I can't seem to breathe

maybe after it all I can go beyond this space in between and meet you somewhere else
a place that doesn't hold all the bad
this feeling teeming with this heartbreak sad
a space where i can say to you that I'm ready to move on from here
there

and the same question comes back, squeezing between those quiet moments of self
finding a way towards my heart and it continues to ask
"where does it all go"

Making the 4th Annual Viva Pomona Music & Arts Festival Flyer

When I think about the relationships that I've made and the people I've met, it makes me emotional and so full of joy that I have the chance to interact with others, get to know them on intimate levels and build relationships. I met my friend Rene five years ago because he randomly contacted me through facebook because he stumbled across my art. He asked me if I could bring artwork, or make something visual for a rally/protest that he was organizing about unjust deportations. I ended making something within a few days and we marched together. We have created lots of things together and I'm proud to say that I'm a part of a music festival from it's origin to now. This will be the 4th annual festival that we do together and I'm really proud of Rene and everyone that was there at king taco the night this idea was created. 

Here's to a really fun festival celebrating friendship, art, and wonderful music. 

It was so fun working on this flyer. I had this idea in my head of creating a group of living things that looked diverse and could represent an audience that was such. I'm really proud of this flyer, and of myself. 

 

I did the drawings in ink pen, and scanned each one individually. I then duplicated the drawings and made 3 hues. Those are the blue & yellow images behind the frontal red images. I found the background in a book called "The Sea" by Life Nature Library. The background is actually 3 different images made to look like one scene(fragmented).

 

 

 

The first draft of the complete flyer. Waiting on some confirmations and this will be really done with, but in the meantime, I'm gonna give myself a pat on the back. pat* pat*

I'm alive, hello.

I've been meaning to create a website for the things that I create and I'm happy that this is finally real. I will be posting about upcoming events, my daily notes, big news and little news. Welcome, thanks for coming to see my electronic webspace bedroom, you don't have to take off your shoes, I'll be right back, I'll get you some water.